Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
by Mitsuki2185
Summary: Kanda's gone missing and no one knows where. As Allen continues to search for his missing comrade he starts to wonder why he's been trying so hard. Why is Kanda so important to him? Yullen. Shounen-Ai/Yaoi. Don't know where it's heading so rated T for now


Disclaimer: I do not own D(dot)Gray-man or really anything else either.

A/N: I typed this up a while ago and totally forgot about it until now. So here it is. It's kind of confusing at first, so I'm sorry if it's hard to follow.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Moyashi…" the voice whispered soft and comforting in his ear.

Allen closed his eyes and let his emotions overwhelm him, washing over him in a way that sent chills down his spine.

"K-kanda?" questioned the white-haired exorcist.

He waited for a reply, but instead found himself pulled backwards into a tight embrace. The arms that hugged him to the other's chest were warm and comforting.

"Moyashi," repeated the voice filled with urgency and panic.

The mysterious person hugged him tighter, but this time there was a desperation and longing in the hug. It was almost as if they were worried that something bad was about to happen.

"W-what is it?" said Allen shakily, his voice echoing in the darkness.

"I-" started the voice, "I need your help, right now I'm-"

The arms around him slowly started disappearing and the voice faded along with them.

"W-wait!" shouted Allen his eyes immediately snapping open as he sat upright; sweat making his snow white hair cling to his forehead.

The name that he just moments before had been ready to scream were now lost on his lips as he struggled to remember the dream that had left him in this state.

It was then that he noticed the tears streaming down his cheeks.

In his dream the person had called him 'Moyashi', there was no doubt about it, he had been dreaming about Kanda. Again.

He splashed his face with water before pulling on a random shirt and pair of pants, stopping only for a moment to peek at his disheveled appearance in the mirror before stumbling out the door.

Speeding down the hall, he knew that even at this hour Komui would still be awake and 'working' in his office (and by working, he meant constructing yet another robot for some completely unnecessary purpose).

It was about half an hour later when he finally knocked on said man's door. He had taken a side trip to the kitchen for a quick late night snack.

"Come in." came Komui's voice from the other side of the door.

Allen opened the door gently and peeked inside. Komui sat at his desk, an open notebook and his usual bunny coffee mug before him.

"What can I do for you Allen-kun?" said Komui not even bothering to look up as Allen entered.

"I had a dream." said Allen hesitantly.

"Ah, so you had a nightmare." said Komui.

"No," said Allen remembering the dream with a smile on his face, "It was…a good dream…a really good dream."

"Oh, so it was a wet dream." said Komui.

"N-no!" stammered Allen blushing furiously, his voice dropping to a whisper, "It…was about Kanda."

Komui paused, finally looking up at Allen with a look of surprise and concern before regaining his composure.

"So it _was_ a wet dream." joked Komui, "You know Allen, it's okay to have a sexual attraction to another man, in fact I remember when _I_-"

Allen paled considerably before giving the psychotic scientist the deadliest look he could muster.

The smile evaporated from his face as he realized that Allen was serious.

"Listen Allen," Komui sighed, taking off his glasses and rubbing the bridge of his nose, "he's already been missing for 6 months and we haven't heard a single word from him, the higher ups are only going to allow us one more month to look for him."

"And…if we still can't find him?" choked Allen.

"Then we have to give up the search. We can't afford to waste any exorcists and you, Allen, have been putting off all your missions since he went missing. I've had to dispatch more and more exorcists just to cover the missions you refused along with the ones that were supposed to be assigned to Kanda. I know that you're concerned about him because he was a…somewhat close friend of yours, but the Black Order can't afford to waste any more time searching for him Allen. _You _can't afford to waste any more time dwelling on him. You're an exorcist for Christ's sake Allen, now start acting like it! You can't just waste your time moping around. People's _lives _are at stake! The whole world is at stake."

"I'm sorry." said Allen. His voice was flat and emotionless, making Komui feel guilty at his sudden outburst.

"You don't need to apologize, but you do need to do your work."

"I know." replied Allen sounding dejected.

"…If I give you a month to search for him however you please…will you just drop the whole Kanda thing?" offered Komui with a sigh.

"Yes." said Allen.

Komui silently acknowledged the change in Allen's composure and attitude. The boy seemed to stand taller and straighter now and his eyes were filled with an emotion the older scientist hadn't seen since Kanda's disappearance.

Allen headed for the exit but stopped in front of the door, his hand on the knob.

"Komui-san," he said without turning around, "**I will find him.**" And with that he left.

"I really do hope so." whispered Komui as Allen left his office, "I really do."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A/N: So how'd you like it? I think it's pretty interesting. Even I can't wait to see how it turns out. Just so you know, I have no idea what's going to happen next. Mainly I just sit and start typing until it starts to sound okay. Anyways, don't forget to review. Reviews motivate me to write faster! Okay, so maybe they don't, but they show me that you care! Really.


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